Sooo Worth 12 Weeks

So at the end of last year, I was pushing Trevor outside his comfort zone. Challenging him to do things he wasn't used to, and making him look at and deal with childhood issues. As I was doing this I realized that I too, had sooo many things that I needed to work on. I didn't feel like there was anywhere to make me get uncomfortable though. Then (due to watching Biggest Loser and talking with friends) decided I needed to accomplish something for myself. I decided that in 2011 I was going to run a half marathon. I was so excited to have a goal to work towards. The next day I got an email from a friend inviting me to a 12 week weight loss competition. I was nervous at the thought of actually committing myself to this, but knew that I had it deep down in me. I signed up and paid my entry fee of $20.00.

Then the first day came. I didn't want to count calories or limit what I could and couldn't eat, so I just started making better choices. I started running every morning. It was January, and below 20 degrees almost everyday. My motto was, "No excuses." Some days the snow would be falling sideways into my eyes and my breath would freeze on my gator upon impact. I didn't care. I had a goal.

Each run became more and more empowering. I could go further than I thought. I had to learn how to deal with blood sugar drops, but quickly learned eating right before and bringing quick sugars (like jelly beans or gummy bears) did the trick. I was starting to feel like I could do it.

Then each day brought more mental battles. (I am convinced these are the harder battles than the exercise and food). I was learning so much that I had not realized. In my whole married life (well, at least since getting pregnant - which was 9 months into our marriage), I had never felt like I could be sexy or flirty. That I didn't look the part. Or even (this is me being brutally honest) that if I was sexy or flirty I would have to be with every male. (I was really good at this as a teenager). So I started learning how to allow myself to feel worthy of being cute, and knowing I was dedicated to Trevor and our marriage. I would find myself looking at other moms with young kids and thinking I could never look that good. I quickly caught myself and told myself there was no reason for me not too.

After about a month and a half into running (I was up to about 5 1/2 mile runs) my friend invited me to go to crossfit with her. This was an elite workout program originally designed for military and police forces. (If you want to check it out, their website is crossfituac.com) My first week I literally could not move. They were asking me to do things I never would have dreamed I could EVER do (even 10 years ago). But day after day, I did them. It was an incredible feeling. And not only that, but I was getting over my weight loss plateou and my muscles were starting to not just exist, but be defined. I couldn't believe how quickly they were changing because of such demanding, short work outs.

And then the last week came. I couldn't believe how quickly 12 weeks had passed, and yet how I felt like I was finally starting to live the life I had always intended for myself. I wasn't moody anymore. I didn't feel like I was constantly fighting a battle of feeling high or low (either from hormones, or blood sugar). I was getting less sleep, yet felt less tired. I got more accomplished in a day than I used to in a week. I didn't snap at the kids as often. I wanted to spend more time with Trevor. I was excited to get dressed in the morning, because clothes looked the way I wanted them too when I got ready. I felt worthy of a daily shower, getting dressed, doing my hair, makeup. I felt worthy of being loved and loving in return. Comfort food didn't sound appealing anymore, and didn't fill a void any longer. It simply made me sick.

12 weeks gave me my life back.

On our final weigh in, I was feeling so proud that I had accomplished what I did, that I didn't even realize that I took 5th place (out of almost 90 girls) in our competition! I was blown away, and so proud that I had allowed myself to work that hard and work through my issues.

(I am in no way trying to be immodest in these pictures... just honest about where I've been and where I am going. And yes, having twins gives you an insane amount of stretch marks!)

I have seen so many other people inspire me, and I hope that any of you reading this can be inspired by me. Please know you are worth it. You can do it. Let yourself!

Beginning weight = 160 pounds, 39 inch waist.

Ending weight = 141 pounds, 133 inch waist ((Owen took my after pictures... he didn't do too bad!))
My awesome supportive hubby let me go get my hair done for my 'finale'. I got it colored like when we were first married (dark and light weaved), and got it cut shorter and new bangs.

So 19 pounds lost (11.9% of my body weight) and 5 1/2 inches on my waist!Thank you to all of you that have helped me on this journey. Thank you to Trevor for always being there for me when I needed to work out mental issues and for always always making time in our day so that I can work out. I love you. Thank you to my dad for always telling me he is so proud of me and being impressed by my work outs. Thank you to my mom for always asking how it is going and being so impressed by my accomplishments. Thank you to everybody that has let me talk your ear off about the work out that day or how sore I am. And thank you to all of you who inspire me so much by your examples!

Carpe Diem!